Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan

Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan

Fish Cheeks is a personal essay by Amy Tan that explores cultural identity and the challenges of adolescence. The narrative centers on Tan's experience of inviting her crush, Robert, to a traditional Chinese Christmas dinner, highlighting her embarrassment over her family's customs. Through vivid descriptions of the meal, Tan reflects on her feelings of shame and the clash between her Chinese heritage and American societal expectations. The essay ultimately conveys a powerful message about embracing one's cultural differences and the importance of familial love. Tan's work resonates with readers navigating similar cultural conflicts, making it a poignant piece for those interested in identity and belonging.

Key Points

  • Explores cultural identity through Amy Tan's personal experiences
  • Describes the clash between Chinese traditions and American customs
  • Highlights the theme of adolescent embarrassment and acceptance
  • Conveys a lesson about embracing cultural differences and familial pride
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Fish Cheeks
Amy Tan
I fell in love with the minister's son the winter I turned fourteen. He was not Chinese, but as white
as Mary in the manger. For Christmas I prayed for this blond-haired boy, Robert, and a slim new
American nose.
When I found out that my parents had invited the minister's family over for Christmas Eve dinner,
I cried. What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy
Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners? What terrible disappoint-ment would he feel
upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet potatoes but Chinese food?
On Christmas Eve I saw that my mother had outdone herself in creating a strange menu. She was
pulling black veins out of the backs of fleshy prawns. The kitchen was littered with appalling mounds of
raw food: A slimy rock cod with bulging eyes that pleaded not to be thrown into a pan of hot oil. Tofu,
which looked like stacked wedges of rubbery white sponges. A bowl soaking dried fungus back to life.
A plate of squid, their backs crisscrossed with knife markings so they resembled bicycle tires.
And then they arrived – the minister's family and all my relatives in a clamor of doorbells and
rumpled Christmas packages. Robert grunted hello, and I pretended he was not worthy of existence.
Dinner threw me deeper into despair. My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached
across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food. Robert and his family waited patiently
for platters to be passed to them. My relatives murmured with pleasure when my mother brought out the
whole steamed fish. Robert grimaced. Then my father poked his chopsticks just below the fish eye and
plucked out the soft meat. "Amy, your favorite," he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to
disappear.
At the end of the meal my father leaned back and belched loudly, thanking my mother for her fine
cooking. "It's a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied," explained my father to our astonished
guests. Robert was looking down at his plate with a reddened face. The minister managed to muster up a
quiet burp. I was stunned into silence for the rest of the night.
After everyone had gone, my mother said to me, "You want to be the same as American girls on
the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must
always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."
And even though I didn't agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had suffered
during the evening's dinner. It wasn't until many year later – long after I had gotten over my crush on
Robert – that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu.
For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.
Questions on Meaning
1. Why does Tan cry when she finds out that the boy she is in love with is coming to dinner?
2. Why does Tan's mother go out of her way to prepare a disturbingly traditional Chinese dinner for her
daughter and guests? What one sentence best sums up the lesson Tan was not able to understand until
years later?
3. How does the fourteen-year-old Tan feel about her Chinese background? about her mother?
4. What is Tan's purpose in writing this essay? Does she just want to entertain readers, or might she have
a weightier goal?
Questions on Writing Strategy
1. How does Tan draw the reader into her story right from the beginning?
2. How does Tan use transitions both to drive and to clarify her narrative?
3. What is the irony of the last sentence of the essay?
4. Paragraph 3 is a passage of pure description. Why does Tan linger over the food? What is the effect
of this paragraph?
Questions on Language
1. The simile about Mary in the second sentence of the essay is surprising. Why? Why is it amusing?
2. How does the narrator's age affect the tone of this essay? Give examples of language particularly
appropriate to a fourteen-year-old.
Suggestions for Writing
1. Journal writing: Think of an occasion when, for whatever reason, you were ashamed of being
different. How did you react? Did you try to hide your difference in order to fit in, or did you reveal or
celebrate your uniqueness?
From journal to essay: Using Tan's essay as a model, write a brief narrative based on the sketch from
your journal. Try to imitate the way Tan integrates the external events of the dinner with her own feelings
about what is going on. Your story may be humorous, like Tan's, or more serious.
2. Take a perspective like that of the minister's son, Robert: Write a narrative essay about a time when
you had to adjust to participating in a culture different from your own. It could be a meal, a wedding or
other rite of passage, a religious ceremony, a trip to another country. What did you learn from your
experiences, about yourself and others?
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FAQs of Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan

What is the main theme of Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan?
The main theme of Fish Cheeks revolves around cultural identity and the struggle to accept one's heritage. Amy Tan reflects on her feelings of embarrassment during a Christmas dinner with her family, where traditional Chinese dishes are served in front of her American crush. This experience highlights the conflict between her desire to fit in with American culture and her pride in her Chinese background. Ultimately, the essay teaches the importance of embracing one's cultural differences and the love that family provides.
How does Amy Tan describe the Christmas dinner in Fish Cheeks?
In Fish Cheeks, Amy Tan vividly describes the Christmas dinner as a chaotic and culturally rich experience. She details the preparation of traditional Chinese dishes, including a whole steamed fish and various seafood, which contrast sharply with the typical American holiday fare. Tan's descriptions evoke both her embarrassment and her eventual appreciation for the meal, as it represents her family's love and the cultural heritage she initially wished to hide. This contrast serves to emphasize the central conflict of the essay.
What lesson does Amy Tan learn from her experience in Fish Cheeks?
Throughout Fish Cheeks, Amy Tan learns a valuable lesson about cultural pride and acceptance. Initially ashamed of her family's customs and the food served at the Christmas dinner, she comes to understand that her heritage is something to be celebrated rather than hidden. Her mother's words about being proud of their differences resonate with her long after the event, illustrating the importance of embracing one's identity. This lesson becomes a crucial part of Tan's journey toward self-acceptance.
Who is the protagonist in Fish Cheeks and what is her conflict?
The protagonist of Fish Cheeks is Amy Tan herself, who faces the internal conflict of cultural identity during her teenage years. As she navigates her feelings for Robert, the minister's son, she grapples with the embarrassment of her Chinese heritage in the face of American cultural norms. This conflict is heightened during the Christmas dinner, where her family's traditional practices clash with her desire to fit in. Tan's journey reflects the universal struggle of adolescents trying to reconcile their cultural backgrounds with societal expectations.
What role do Amy Tan's parents play in Fish Cheeks?
In Fish Cheeks, Amy Tan's parents play a significant role in shaping her understanding of cultural identity. Her mother, in particular, emphasizes the importance of being proud of their Chinese heritage, even when faced with embarrassment. Through her mother's actions and words, Tan learns that familial love and cultural traditions are integral to her identity. This relationship highlights the theme of acceptance and the value of embracing one's background, ultimately guiding Tan toward self-acceptance.

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