I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream

I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream

“I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison is a horror/sci-fi story about a sentient supercomputer, AM, which has destroyed humanity, keeping only five people alive to torture endlessly. The narrator, Ted, kills the others to end their suffering, but AM stops him and turns him into a helpless “soft jelly thing” to suffer forever.

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5/18/2015 IHaveNoMouth,andIMustScreambyHarlanEllison
http://hermiene.net/shortstories/i_have_no_mouth.html 1/11
IHaveNoMouth,andIMust
Scream
byHarlanEllison
Limp,thebodyofGorristerhungfromthepinkpalette;unsupported—hanging
highaboveusinthecomputerchamber;anditdidnotshiverinthechill,oilybreeze
thatbleweternallythroughthemaincavern.Thebodyhungheaddown,attachedto
theundersideofthepalettebythesoleofitsrightfoot.Ithadbeendrainedofblood
throughapreciseincisionmadefromeartoearunderthelanternjaw.Therewasno
bloodonthereflectivesurfaceofthemetalfloor.
WhenGorristerjoinedourgroupandlookedupathimself,itwasalreadytoo
lateforustorealizethat,onceagain,AMhaddupedus,hadhaditsfun;ithadbeena
diversiononthepartofthemachine.Threeofushadvomited,turningawayfrom
oneanotherinareflexasancientasthenauseathathadproducedit.
Gorristerwentwhite.Itwasalmostasthoughhehadseenavoodooicon,and
wasafraidofthefuture."Oh,God,"hemumbled,andwalkedaway.Thethreeofus
followedhimafteratime,andfoundhimsittingwithhisbacktooneofthesmaller
chitteringbanks,hisheadinhishands.Ellenkneltdownbesidehimandstrokedhis
hair.Hedidn'tmove,buthisvoicecameoutofhiscoveredfacequiteclearly."Why
doesn'titjustdousinandgetitoverwith?Christ,Idon'tknowhowmuchlongerI
cangoonlikethis."
Itwasouronehundredandninthyearinthecomputer.
Hewasspeakingforallofus.
Nimdok(whichwasthenamethemachinehadforcedhimtouse,becauseAM
amuseditselfwithstrangesounds)washallucinatingthattherewerecannedgoods
intheicecaverns.GorristerandIwereverydubious."It'sanothershuck,"Itold
them."LikethegoddamfrozenelephantAMsoldus.Bennyalmostwentoutofhis
mindoverthatone.We'llhikeallthatwayandit'llbeputrifiedorsomedamnthing.
Isayforgetit.Stayhere,it'llhavetocomeupwithsomethingprettysoonorwe'll
die."
Bennyshrugged.Threedaysithadbeensincewe'dlasteaten.Worms.Thick,
ropey.
5/18/2015 IHaveNoMouth,andIMustScreambyHarlanEllison
http://hermiene.net/shortstories/i_have_no_mouth.html 2/11
Nimdokwasnomorecertain.Heknewtherewasthechance,buthewasgetting
thin.Itcouldn'tbeanyworsethere,thanhere.Colder,butthatdidn'tmattermuch.
Hot,cold,hail,lava,boilsorlocusts—itnevermattered:themachinemasturbated
andwehadtotakeitordie.
Ellendecidedus."I'vegottohavesomething,Ted.Maybethere'llbesome
Bartlettpearsorpeaches.Please,Ted,let'stryit."
Igaveineasily.Whatthehell.Matterednotatall.Ellenwasgrateful,though.
Shetookmetwiceoutofturn.Eventhathadceasedtomatter.Andshenevercame,
sowhybother?Butthemachinegiggledeverytimewedidit.Loud,upthere,back
there,allaroundus,hesnickered.Itsnickered.MostofthetimeIthoughtofAMas
it,withoutasoul;buttherestofthetimeIthoughtofitashim,inthemasculine...
thepaternal...thepatriarchal...forheisajealouspeople.Him.It.GodasDaddythe
Deranged.
WeleftonaThursday.Themachinealwayskeptusuptodateonthedate.The
passageoftimewasimportant;nottous,sureashell,buttohim...it...AM.
Thursday.Thanks.
NimdokandGorristercarriedEllenforawhile,theirhandslockedtotheirown
andeachother'swrists,aseat.BennyandIwalkedbeforeandafter,justtomake
surethat,ifanythinghappened,itwouldcatchoneofusandatleastEllenwouldbe
safe.Fatchance,safe.Didn'tmatter.
Itwasonlyahundredmilesorsototheicecaverns,andthesecondday,when
wewerelyingoutundertheblisteringsunthinghehadmaterialized,hesentdown
somemanna.Tastedlikeboiledboarurine.Weateit.
Onthethirddaywepassedthroughavalleyofobsolescence,filledwithrusting
carcassesofancientcomputerbanks.AMhadbeenasruthlesswithitsownlifeas
withours.Itwasamarkofhispersonality:itstroveforperfection.Whetheritwasa
matterofkillingoffunproductiveelementsinhisownworldfillingbulk,or
perfectingmethodsfortorturingus,AMwasasthoroughasthosewhohadinvented
him—nowlongsincegonetodust—couldeverhavehoped.
Therewaslightfilteringdownfromabove,andwerealizedwemustbeverynear
thesurface.Butwedidn'ttrytocrawluptosee.Therewasvirtuallynothingout
there;hadbeennothingthatcouldbeconsideredanythingforoverahundredyears.
Onlytheblastedskinofwhathadoncebeenthehomeofbillions.Nowtherewere
onlyfiveofus,downhereinside,alonewithAM.
IheardEllensayingfrantically,"No,Benny!Don't,comeon,Benny,don't
please!"
AndthenIrealizedIhadbeenhearingBennymurmuring,underhisbreath,for
severalminutes.Hewassaying,"I'mgonnagetout,I'mgonnagetout..."overand
over.Hismonkeylikefacewascrumbledupinanexpressionofbeatificdelightand
sadness,allatthesametime.TheradiationscarsAMhadgivenhimduringthe
"festival"weredrawndownintoamassofpinkwhitepuckerings,andhisfeatures
seemedtoworkindependentlyofoneanother.PerhapsBennywastheluckiestofthe
fiveofus:hehadgonestark,staringmadmanyyearsbefore.
ButeventhoughwecouldcallAManydamnedthingweliked,couldthinkthe
foulestthoughtsoffusedmemorybanksandcorrodedbaseplates,ofburntout
circuitsandshatteredcontrolbubbles,themachinewouldnottolerateourtryingto
escape.BennyleapedawayfrommeasImadeagrabforhim.Hescrambledupthe
faceofasmallermemorycube,tiltedonitssideandfilledwithrottedcomponents.
5/18/2015 IHaveNoMouth,andIMustScreambyHarlanEllison
http://hermiene.net/shortstories/i_have_no_mouth.html 3/11
Hesquattedthereforamoment,lookinglikethechimpanzeeAMhadintendedhim
toresemble.
Thenheleapedhigh,caughtatrailingbeamofpittedandcorrodedmetal,and
wentupit,handoverhandlikeananimal,tillhewasonagirderedledge,twenty
feetaboveus.
"Oh,Ted,Nimdok,please,helphim,gethimdownbefore—"Shecutoff.Tears
begantostandinhereyes.Shemovedherhandsaimlessly.
Itwastoolate.Noneofuswantedtobenearhimwhenwhateverwasgoingto
happen,happened.Andbesides,weallsawthroughherconcern.WhenAMhad
alteredBenny,duringthemachine'sutterlyirrational,hystericalphase,itwasnot
merelyBenny'sfacethecomputerhadmadelikeagiantape's.Hewasbiginthe
privates;shelovedthat!Sheservicedus,asamatterofcourse,butsheloveditfrom
him.OhEllen,pedestalEllen,pristinepureEllen;ohEllentheclean!Scumfilth.
Gorristerslappedher.Sheslumpeddown,staringupatpoorloonieBenny,and
shecried.Itwasherbigdefense,crying.Wehadgottenusedtoitseventyfiveyears
earlier.Gorristerkickedherintheside.
Thenthesoundbegan.Itwaslight,thatsound.Halfsoundandhalflight,
somethingthatbegantoglowfromBenny'seyes,andpulsewithgrowingloudness,
dimsonoritiesthatgrewmoregiganticandbrighterasthelight/soundincreasedin
tempo.Itmusthavebeenpainful,andthepainmusthavebeenincreasingwiththe
boldnessofthelight,therisingvolumeofthesound,forBennybegantomewllikea
woundedanimal.Atfirstsoftly,whenthelightwasdimandthesoundwasmuted,
thenlouderashisshouldershunchedtogether:hisbackhumped,asthoughhewas
tryingtogetawayfromit.Hishandsfoldedacrosshischestlikeachipmunk's.His
headtiltedtotheside.Thesadlittlemonkeyfacepinchedinanguish.Thenhebegan
tohowl,asthesoundcomingfromhiseyesgrewlouder.Louderandlouder.I
slappedthesidesofmyheadwithmyhands,butIcouldn'tshutitout,itcutthrough
easily.Thepainshiveredthroughmyfleshliketinfoilonatooth.
AndBennywassuddenlypullederect.Onthegirderhestoodup,jerkedtohis
feetlikeapuppet.Thelightwasnowpulsingoutofhiseyesintwogreatround
beams.Thesoundcrawledupandupsomeincomprehensiblescale,andthenhefell
forward,straightdown,andhittheplatesteelfloorwithacrash.Helaytherejerking
spasticallyasthelightflowedaroundandaroundhimandthesoundspiraledupout
ofnormalrange.
Thenthelightbeatitswaybackinsidehishead,thesoundspiraleddown,and
hewasleftlyingthere,cryingpiteously.
Hiseyesweretwosoft,moistpoolsofpuslikejelly.AMhadblindedhim.
GorristerandNimdokandmyself...weturnedaway.Butnotbeforewecaughtthe
lookofreliefonEllen'swarm,concernedface.
Seagreenlightsuffusedthecavernwherewemadecamp.AMprovidedpunk
andweburnedit,sittinghuddledaroundthewanandpatheticfire,tellingstoriesto
keepBennyfromcryinginhispermanentnight.
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