I
twasawonderfulnight,suchanightasisonlypossiblewhenweareyoung,
dearreader.Theskywassostarry,sobrightthat,lookingatit,onecouldnot
help asking oneself whether ill-humoured and capricious people could live
undersuchasky.Thatisayouthfulquestiontoo,dearreader,veryyouthful,but
maytheLordputitmorefrequentlyintoyourheart!...Speakingofcapricious
andill-humouredpeople,Icannothelprecallingmymoralconditionallthatday.
FromearlymorningIhadbeenoppressedbyastrangedespondency.Itsuddenly
seemedtomethatIwaslonely,thateveryonewasforsakingmeandgoingaway
fromme.Ofcourse,anyoneisentitledtoaskwho“everyone”was.ForthoughI
hadbeenlivingalmosteightyearsinPetersburgIhadhardlyanacquaintance.But
what did I want with acquaintances? I was acquainted with all Petersburg as it
was;thatwaswhyIfeltasthoughtheywerealldesertingmewhenallPetersburg
packedupand wenttoits summervilla.I felt afraidof being leftalone,and for
threewholedaysIwanderedaboutthetowninprofounddejection,notknowing
whattodowithmyself.WhetherIwalkedintheNevsky,wenttotheGardensor
sauntered on the embankment, there was not one face of those I had been
accustomedtomeetatthesametimeandplacealltheyear.They,ofcourse,do
not know me, but I know them. I know them intimately, I have almost made a
studyoftheirfaces,andamdelightedwhentheyaregay,anddowncastwhenthey
areunderacloud.IhavealmoststruckupafriendshipwithoneoldmanwhomI
meet every blessed day, at the same hour in Fontanka. Such a grave, pensive
countenance; he is always whispering to himself and brandishing his left arm,
while in his right hand he holds a long gnarled stick with a gold knob. He even
noticesmeandtakesawarminterestinme.IfIhappennottobeatacertaintime
inthesamespotinFontanka,Iamcertainhefeelsdisappointed.Thatishowitis
thatwealmostbowtoeachother,especiallywhenwearebothingoodhumour.
The other day, when we had not seen each other for two days and met on the
third, we were actually touching our hats, but, realizing in time, dropped our
handsandpassedeachotherwithalookofinterest.
Iknowthehousestoo.AsIwalkalongtheyseemtorunforwardinthestreets
tolookoutatmefromeverywindow,andalmosttosay:“Good-morning!Howdo
youdo?Iamquite well, thankGod,andIamtohaveanewstoreyinMay,”or,
FIRSTNIGHT